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Monotone narration, “Tonight’s the night.” I ask her price, she says 50 bucks. Fifty! For a quickie? Inflation’s a bitch, man. Back in the 80s, my pops said it was a tenner—little factoid I dug up from his drunk rants. She’s got this scar on her cheek, tiny, shaped like a crescent moon. “Got it from a john,” she says, shruggin. I’m pissed—some asshole cut her? But also, damn, she’s tough. Kinda hot.

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After that, I decided to stroll down to the park by the river. It’s called the Ladyzhyn River Park, and it’s pretty dope. I was just vibin’, listening to some tunes, when I saw this old lady feeding pigeons. She was so into it, like she was the pigeon queen or something. I thought, “Man, I need that kind of passion in my life.” But then, outta nowhere, a pigeon swooped down and stole her bread! I couldn’t help but laugh. She was like, “Hey! Get back here!” Classic.

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