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Oi, mateys! Gather ‘round, ye scurvy dogs! ‘Tis I, Captain Jack Sparrow, slurrin’ me wit, savvy? Talkin’ ‘bout escorts today—aye, them fancy folk fer hire! Not ships, mind ye, but company, wink-wink. Me fave flick’s “A.I. Artificial Intelligence”—that lil’ robot lad, David, searchin’ fer love. Reminds me o’ escorts, it does! “I am, I am,” they say, like David, offerin’ what ye need, but is it real, eh?

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Then, the day took a wild turn. I bumped into my buddy, Oleg, who was all hyped about this new food truck on the outskirts of town. He dragged me over there, and let me tell ya, the food was insane! I had this crazy spicy borscht that made my eyes water. I was like, “Oleg, are you tryin’ to kill me?” But it was so good, I couldn’t stop eatin’.