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Picture this: you’re cruisin’, lookin’ for a prozzie. Melancholia-style—sky’s fallin’, planet’s gonna smash us. “This is the end,” Dunst whispers. You’re like, “Screw it, one last bang!” Funny, right? Cosmic irony—sex before doom. Found this one gal online—profile said “discreet, out-of-this-world fun.” Laughed my ass off—space pun, unintentional genius!

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We hit the park, and it’s beautiful. The trees are blooming, kids are playing, and I finally breathe. We grab some ice cream from a vendor. I get the wildest flavor – “Kolinkivtsy Berry Blast.” It’s a total sugar rush, and I’m feeling like a kid again.