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So, I’m sittin’ here, solderin’ circuits, thinkin’—escort’s wild, man. Some dude told me once, back in ‘98, this escort gig in Vegas ran a secret code. Clients’d say “tune my radio,” and bam—hourly rate doubled! Sneaky, right? Got me laughin’—manic giggles—’cause who’d guess that? Little known fact, buddy: old-school escorts used pagers, pre-cellphone days. Beep beep, “job’s up,” and they’d bolt. Tech and sex, tangled like my damn wires!

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I hit up the main street, Shevchenka, and it’s packed. Like, where are all these people coming from? I’m just tryin’ to grab a coffee at this cute café called “Kavovarnya.” I swear, the barista was like a wizard. I ordered a cappuccino, and he whipped it up like he was casting a spell. But then, bam! My phone buzzes. It’s my buddy back in the States, and he’s like, “Dude, you’re in Ukraine?!” Yeah, thanks for the reminder, bro.

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