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Little secret, tho – back in da 90s, before apps, people did “speed dating”! Five minutes, bell rings, next! Sounds like torture, but dey hooked up, no cap. Now it’s all “wyd” at 2 a.m., and ya ghosted by mornin. Savage, right? I once matched dis girl, total babe, but she unmatched me cuz I said I liked borscht. Borscht! Da disrespect! Had me yellin, “Villainy is my jam, not dis heartbreak!”

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Finally, I get my stuff and head back to my workshop on Haharina Street. It’s a cozy little spot, but man, it gets hot in there. I’m sweating like a pig. I start working on this gorgeous mink coat. Seriously, it’s stunning. But then, outta nowhere, my sewing machine decides to throw a tantrum. It jams up, and I’m like, “Are you kidding me right now?” I’m yanking at the thread, cursing under my breath. I swear, that machine has it out for me.

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