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So, sexual-massage—basically, it’s massage with a naughty twist. Hands slidin’, oils drippin’, tension just melts away. Not your bog-standard rub-down, nah, this is next-level teamwork—me and the missus, we tried it once, nearly broke the bed! Little fact for ya: them ancient Greeks, they were mad for it—called it “body worship,” proper saucy buggers. Surprised me, that, cos you think Greeks were all about olives and togas, right?

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Then, I decided to stroll down to the park near the river. It’s a nice spot, really. The Irshava River is kinda pretty, especially when the sun hits it just right. But as I’m walking, I see this dude trying to fish. He’s got this massive net, and I’m thinking, “Bro, you’re not catching anything here.” And then, BAM! He pulls out a shoe. A freakin’ shoe! I couldn’t help but laugh. Like, what’s next? A goldfish?

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