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But real talk—sometimes it’s awkward, right? Ya lay there, pants off, wonderin’ if ya smell like feet. Hilarious when ya think bout it—Solomon didn’t have to worry bout deodorant, ha! I’m exaggeratin’, sure, but that first touch? Electric. Makes ya jump—like, “Whoa, calm down, Bern!” Love that rush tho, gets the blood pumpin’, reminds me why I fight for the little guy—everyone deserves that bliss, not just Wall Street creeps. Billionaires should not exist!—hoardin’ pleasure while we scrape by? Nah, sexual-massage for the 99%, that’s my platform!

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I’m running around, trying to get everything in order. I’m sweating bullets. I mean, who even has time for this? I’m just a supervisor, not a miracle worker! I grab some papers, and of course, I spill coffee all over them. Classic me.

Oleksandr Slisarenko