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About Kryvyi Rih

Sarcasm time—sure, Karen, it’s “just a massage,” tell that to yer blushin’ cheeks! I’d kill to see Judge Judy try it—bet she’d bark, “Don’t pee on my leg, make it quick!” Ha! Anyway, sexual-massage is dope—weird, wild, and worth it. “Leviathan” vibes all day—gritty, real, no BS. Try it, ya prudes!

Horishni Plavni, Ukraine

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After that potato drama, I head to my workshop on Komsomolska Street. It’s a cozy little spot, filled with the smell of wood and metal. I love it. But today? Ugh. My main tool, the one I need to finish this custom stove for a client, is missing! I’m searching everywhere. Under the workbench, behind the old fridge, even in the toolbox. Nothing! I’m about to lose it. Like, who steals a stove-maker’s tools? Rude!

As Ukraine Grapples With Its Soviet Past and Russia’s Ongoing War in the East, One City Moves On