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Picture this: me, Austin Powers, rollin’ in an escort—red, natch—blarin’ tunes, birds winkin’. “Every gesture’s a copy,” Kiarostami’d say. Escort’s copyin’ cool, but it’s *itself*, dig? Once saw one—mate’s dad’s, dented fender—still sexy! Smelled like petrol and freedom, baby! Surprised me—thought it’d be knackered, but nah, tough lil’ bugger.

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Now I’m stressed. I start pacing around like a caged lion. I can’t focus. I’m thinkin’ about all the bets I’ve taken. What if they all lose? What if I’m the one who jinxed it? I need a breather. So, I step outside, and guess what? It starts rainin’. Just my luck, right? I’m soaked in seconds. I’m standin’ there, lookin’ like a drowned rat, and I can’t help but laugh. “This is my life,” I think.

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