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About Lviv

Alright, pal, listen up—I'm Gordon Gekko, the fuckin’ Violin Maker, and greed is good, baby! Sexual-massage? Oh, it’s the shit, the real deal, like strippin’ down life to its raw, juicy core. I’m talkin’ hands slidin’ over skin, oil drippin’, tension meltin’ like butter on a hot skillet. It’s power, it’s control, it’s greed for pleasure—mine, hers, who gives a fuck? I saw *Blue Is the Warmest Color*—fuckin’ masterpiece, man—Adèle’s eyes, that hunger, “I missed you so much I couldn’t breathe,” that’s sexual-massage vibes right there, desperate, messy, alive.

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Then I met up with my friend Oleg. We were supposed to chill at the café on Hnivan’s main square. But guess what? It was closed! I mean, who closes a café on a Saturday? So we ended up at this tiny place on Kostiantynivska Street. The coffee was decent, but the service? Don’t even get me started. The waiter was so slow, I thought he was on a coffee break himself.

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