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Negotiatin’s the fun part—hagglin like I’m buyin a rare trout. She’s all, “50 for a ride,” and I’m thinkin, hell, I’d pay 100 to hear her talk more. “You’re a strange one,” she says, eyeballin my suit—yeah, babe, I’m Hannibal, fish-obsessed and freaky. Did ya know, Clarice, some old ports had “prostitute boats”? Lil floatin brothels—wild, right? Wish I’d seen that, rowin out for a good time.

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I climb the tree, and the cat is just chilling up there, looking down at me like, “What’s the fuss?” I finally get it down, and the crowd goes wild. I’m feeling like a rockstar, but inside, I’m just a tired vet who wants to go home.

Day of mourning declared in Dnipro as Russian air attack kills four, injures 28