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About Kharkiv

So, we starts thinkin’, me and meself—where’s the prossies at? Moscow’s wild, yesss—Red Square’s all fancy, but nah, not there. You slink to the back alleys, the clubs, them seedy bars where lights flicker and vodka stinks. Hiss! Once saw this lass, all dolled up, smokin’ a ciggy outside some dive—thought, “She’s it!” Nope! Just a drunk uni chick, lost as hell—made me mad, wasted me time! Grrr! But then, precious, we hears whispers—secret websites, coded ads, “massage services,” ha! Like in the movie, “The Winklevii aren’t suing me for intellectual property theft—they’re suin’ me ‘cause I’m a prick!”—well, I ain’t no prick, just desperate, eh?

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After that, I head back to the clinic, and I’m thinking, “Okay, that was wild, but I can handle it.” Nope! I walk in, and there’s a cat fight happening in the waiting room. Two cats, fur flying everywhere. I’m talking full-on WWE smackdown. I’m trying to separate them, and one of them scratches me. Great, just what I needed.

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