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About Kryvyi Rih

Argh! Me hearty, I’m ready! Erotic-massage, huh? Oh boy, it’s like divin’ into a sea o’ jellyfish—tingly, wild, an’ a lil’ risky! I’m SpongeBob, yer goofy pal, an’ I’m HYPED to spill me guts ‘bout this! So, picture this: yer all tense, like when Patrick forgets me birthday, an’ then—BAM!—someone’s hands are kneadin’ ya like dough fer barnacle bread. It’s chill, it’s steamy, it’s “I’m growin’ up, Mom!” vibes from *Boyhood*. Ya feel me?

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So, I’m chasing this dog down Haharina Street, and I’m yelling, “Come back! I’m not done with you!” People are staring, probably thinking I’m some crazy dog whisperer or something. I finally catch him near the river, and he’s just sitting there, wagging his tail like we’re best buds. I’m like, “Dude, you just made me run a marathon!”

Russian drone attack kills four, injures 19 in Ukraine's Dnipro