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About Lviv

Oh, and the oils – slippery as a politician’s promise! Lavender, coconut, whatever – smells like hippy bollocks. Sarcastic cheer here – “Ooh, so exotic, you wanker!” Still, gets ya loose, them tight shoulders melting. Ever tried it? Don’t lie, ya curious sod! Reckon it’s overhyped tho – 9 times outta 10, it’s just a tease. Like *Boyhood*, builds up slow, then – nowt! Still, if ya got the dosh, why not? Just don’t tell the missus, eh – she’d have me bollocks! Cheers, you tosser, next round’s on you!

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First off, I hit up the market on Vulytsia Shchorsa. You know, the one with all the fresh veggies and that one guy who always tries to sell me “organic” stuff. Like, dude, I’m just here for some tomatoes, not a lecture on kale. Anyway, I grab my usual, and this old lady starts yelling at me. Turns out, I accidentally bumped her cart. I’m like, “Sorry, babushka!” But she’s not having it. She’s waving her hands like she’s conducting an orchestra. I just wanted my tomatoes, man!

Russians likely capture Kurakhove in Donetsk region, says ISW