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So, sexual-massage—ain’t just rubbin’ backs, nah! It’s old, like ancient-old—Egyptians did it, freaky Pharaohs gettin’ oily with servants. Bet they whispered, “We rules everything around here,” while some chick kneaded their royal asses! Makes me giggle, them fancy kings all soft—ha! Me, I’d claw the table, too tense, too twitchy for that!

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Later, I headed to the park on Pushkina Street. It’s my go-to spot for chillin’. I plopped down on a bench, just soaking it all in. The trees were swaying, and the sound of laughter filled the air. I thought about how lucky I am to live in a place like this. But then, my phone buzzed. It was my boss. “Need those designs ASAP!” Ugh, the stress! I mean, can’t a guy enjoy a moment?

U.S.-backed report says Russia has held at least 6,000 Ukrainian children for 're-education'