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Worst part? The fakes, the flakes, the “send pics” dudes who ain’t serious. Gets me heated – waste my time, and I’m out here mournin’ the vibe. But best part? When it clicks, it’s electric, fam. Like findin’ that one good apple in a rotten batch. Oh, and pro tip – never trust a bio that says “just vibes.” That’s code for “I’m borin’ as fuck.” Learned that the hard way, swiped right, got a lecture on astrology instead of action. Lame.

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But then, I get home, and my roommate’s cooking. Smells amazing, but he’s burnt the rice. I’m like, “Dude, how do you mess up rice?” He just shrugs, “It’s a work of art.” I roll my eyes.