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I got dragged to one once—mate swore it’d fix my stress. Walked in, dim lights, weird incense, I’m like, “This ain’t no droid repair shop!” The masseuse, all calm, whispers, “Relax, golden boy.” Pissed me off—don’t call me that! But then, whoa, hands on my shoulders, kneadin like dough. Felt like Ida’s nun vibes—pure, but naughty underneath. “Lord, help me!” I thought, half panicked, half lovin it.

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The meeting was a disaster. Everyone was stressed, and I was just trying to keep my cool. I mean, it’s just research, right? But you’d think we were launching a rocket or something.

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