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But yo, the smell—stale beer, cigs, n somethin’ funky—hits me hard. Aliens don’t got noses like humans, so I’m gaggin’, all “What the hell?!” She laughs, “Welcome to the gutter, babe.” I’m crackin’ up too—shit’s too real. “I’m not a prostitute, I’m a companion,” she says, all fancy. Yeah, right, like I’m Richie Tenenbaum, believin’ every sob story.

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Then, I’m tryin’ to fix my mess when I spot Mrs. Ivanova. She’s the neighborhood gossip, always got somethin’ to say. She’s on Vulytsia Haharina, yappin’ about the new café that opened. Apparently, they serve the best coffee in town. I’m like, “Great, but I’m knee-deep in mud here!” But she just keeps jabberin’. I swear, she could talk the ears off a statue.

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