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But then—ugh—some dude next door starts moanin’ LOUD, and I’m pissed. Like, bro, keep it down, I’m tryna vibe here! Therapist whispers, “Focus on the touch,” and I’m like, touché, lady, touché. Skin’s buzzin’, muscles unclenchin’, it’s wild—almost too good. *Moolaadé* pops in my head again—“The past is not dead”—and I’m thinkin’, sexual-massage been around forever, huh? Bet those village elders got sneaky massages too, ha!

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So, I decide to stroll down to the market on Shevchenka Street. You know, the one with all the fresh produce and those crazy vendors? I’m dodging people left and right, and I spot this old lady selling the juiciest tomatoes. I’m talking about tomatoes that look like they’ve been kissed by the sun. I grab a few, and she starts telling me about her garden. I’m like, “Lady, I just want the tomatoes, not a life story!” But she’s relentless. I’m smiling, but inside, I’m like, “C’mon, I got places to be!”

Activists searched for illegal logging in the Carpathians in September-October 2024: what they found