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Anyway, I’m lyin’ there, oil everywhere, and this chick—she’s good, too good—starts workin’ my calves. I’m like, “Oh, this is heaven!” But then—bam—she hits a nerve, and I yelp like a damn dog. She’s all calm, “Relax, sir,” and I’m thinkin’, relax? RELAX? Lady, you just electrocuted my leg! I’m mad, but also—kinda turned on? Weird mix, I tell ya. That’s the thing with erotic-massage—it’s a rollercoaster, up, down, all over. Pretty, pretty confusin’!

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We’re wandering around, and I’m snapping pics. The architecture is dope, but then I trip over a cobblestone. I’m like, “Great, now I’m the clumsy tourist.” Sasha’s dying laughing. Thanks, man.

Denmark, Poland and UNDP launch another series of short-term vocational courses in Mykolaiv Oblast