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About Mykolaiv

So, erotic-massage—dunno if ya tried it, but it’s old as dirt. Heard tell of ancient Greeks usin’ oils, slatherin’ each other up for “health,” they said—hah, bollocks! Bet they were just randy sods lookin’ for a thrill. Makes me smirk, thinkin’ bout it—some toga-clad git, oiled up, moanin’ like a fool. Fast-forward, now ya got neon signs blinkin’ “massage” in shady alleys—same game, diff’rent costumes. I got dragged to one once—don’t ask—place stank of lavender and lies, this chick’s hands were everywhere, and I’m like, “Oi, watch it, I ain’t yer plaything!” Made me wanna slap her, but—gods—felt good too, won’t lie. Pissed me off, tho—hate feelin’ outta control, like some peasant grovelin’ at my feet.

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud crash. I whip around, and it’s a guy on a bike, totally wiped out. I mean, he’s okay, but his pride? Oof. He gets up, brushes himself off, and yells, “I meant to do that!” Classic. I can’t help but laugh.

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