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About Donetsk

Oh, and the smells, man – lavender or some crap, gets me sneezin’. Hate that part, but the rest? Dope. Exaggeratin’ a bit, maybe, but it’s like your body’s screamin’, “Yo, keep goin’!” Ever tried it? You’d dig it, probly. Just don’t tell Marge – she’d flip! Hella awkward if she knew Bart’s spillin’ on sexual-massage. Eat my shorts, I’m out!

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First thing, I spill coffee all over my work shirt. Classic me. I’m runnin’ late, so I just throw on a jacket and dash out. I hit the streets, and it’s like a scene from a movie. People hustlin’ and bustlin’ on Shevchenka Street. I swear, if I see one more babushka with a bag of potatoes, I’m gonna lose it. They’re like ninjas, sneakin’ up on ya with their carts.

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