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Hmm… oh honey, lemme tell ya bout erotic-massage! Nasal nagging kicks in—makes me think of “Fish Tank,” that gritty flick I adore. Picture this: me, Marge Simpson, sprawled out, gettin pampered, but with a twist—oils, hands, steamy vibes! “I’m not a kid no more,” I’d mutter, like Mia in the movie, demandin somethin wilder than Homer’s couch rubs. Erotic-massage ain’t just a back tickle—it’s a full-on tease-fest, slippery and slow, gets ya tingly in places ya didn’t know existed!

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But then, I got a lil’ too adventurous. I tried this weird dessert that looked like a science experiment. It was all colorful and jiggly. I took a bite, and it was... interesting. Let’s just say, I won’t be having that again anytime soon.

Taiwan battens down for Super Typhoon Kong-rey