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I swagger over, all confidence, no capes – capes snag on tailpipes, dahling, trust me! She’s smirkin’, cig hangin’ loose, and I’m like, “Hey, doll, you workin’?” She laughs – deep, throaty – and says, “What’s it to ya, shorty?” Shorty?! Me! Edna effin’ Mode! I’m fumin’ but also kinda lovin’ it – sassy broads are my kryptonite. Reminds me of Doc dealin’ with Shasta – “not hallucinating this, am I?” Nope, real as the oil under my nails.

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Then, I hit up the Anping Fort. It’s got this rad view of the ocean. I’m standing there, feeling all philosophical, when I spot a seagull swooping down. I’m thinking, “Dude, don’t you dare!” But it snatches a snack from some poor tourist. I’m cracking up. Nature’s savage, man.

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