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Oh, and get this—some dude once paid her in Bitocin—BITCOIN! She’s like, “What’m I s’posed to do with this crap?” I’m dyin’—imagine her starin’ at a screen, tryna cash out! Tech bros ruin everythin’, I swear. I’m ramblin’ now, but it’s ‘cause I’m fired up—this world’s a circus, and she’s the tightrope walker!

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But then, outta nowhere, it started pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. We dashed for cover under a nearby awning on Pinglin’s main street. I was soaked, and my hair looked like a wet mop. Jess was laughing so hard, I thought she’d fall over. “This is the worst day ever!” I yelled, but I couldn’t help but chuckle too.

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