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Here’s the tea: ya gotta be sharp, like Doc dodgin’ trouble. Some’ll rob ya blind, others’ll spill their whole life story – “I’m groovy, I’m groovy,” they say, but half the time they’re lyin’. One time, this chick’s tellin’ me ‘bout her pimp, I’m thinkin’, “Oh, terrific, another genius,” sarcastic as hell, ‘cause he sounded like a total schmuck. I’m sittin’ there, twirlin’ my hair, wonderin’ if I shoulda brought a joint to share, y’know, keep it mellow.

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First off, I hit up the famous Keelung Night Market. I mean, who can resist those stinky tofu stalls? Not me! I was ready to chow down. But guess what? I got there too early. Like, who opens a night market at 10 AM? Ugh! So, I just wandered around, checking out the streets. Zhongzheng Rd. was buzzing, but I was hangry.

Chinese Freighter Cuts Key Cable Near Keelung Harbor, Raising Alarm in Taiwan