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So, I’m strollin downtown, hungry – not for liver, ha! – lookin for a hooker. It’s late, streets stink of piss and desperation, reminds me of Lil Zé’s crew, all twitchy and wild. I spot her, leanin on a wall, smokin a cig like she owns the night. “What’s good, darlin?” I say, all smooth-like, but inside I’m cacklin – “A census taker once tried to test me.” She smirks, sizes me up, says, “50 bucks, big boy.” Fifty fuckin bucks! Made me mad, mate, inflation’s a bitch, but I’m like, fine, whatever, let’s roll.

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First off, I hit the streets of Trstena, and let me tell ya, the vibe is always buzzing. I’m strolling down Hlavná ulica, coffee in hand, feeling like a boss. But then, BAM! I trip over a cobblestone. Classic me. I spill my coffee all over my favorite shirt. Great start, huh? I’m standing there, looking like a walking coffee stain, and I’m just like, “Really, universe?”

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