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So, I’m like, “Nah, babe, I’m good,” and she’s salty as hell, tossin’ shade – “You’re no fun, big guy!” I laugh, ‘cause, shit, I just jumped outta a plane, I’m fun enough! Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” Funny thing? She had this tat – a parachute! I’m thinkin’, “Yo, that’s fate or some freaky coincidence!” Got me hyped, like maybe she’s a badass in disguise, but nah, just a hustle. Still, I tipped her a twenty – respect the grind, ya feel me?

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I hang around Lavender Park most nights, its river winding—what is it?—the Blue Vein. Nah, I'm jokin', but that river’s got soul. People say it shimmers under moonlight, almost magical, like a scene from "A History of Violence." Cronenberg did say "Violence is as natural as breathe," right? Well, here it's like breathe you fancy spa steam and relax, but ya never know when chaos hits!

Elite ski jumper comes out as gay on New Year’s Day with message of heartbreak over death of boyfriend