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The film’s got that line—“I’m not a monster!”—and I’m yelling it at these massage parlours. You’re not fooling anyone, you greasy sods! Funniest bit? Some twat wrote a thesis—proper uni stuff—claiming it’s “therapeutic”. Therapeutic my arse! Exaggerating? Maybe. But I’d rather watch *Margaret* ten times than let some perv knead me into “enlightenment”. Total con—handsy blokes charging a ton to faff about. Reckon they deserve a slap, not my cash. Oi, “You think you’re so special!”—straight outta the movie, straight at them. What a laugh! Sexual-massage—sod off with your slippery nonsense!

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So, I rush back to the lab on Špitálska ulica. I’m speed-walkin’, dodgin’ people like I’m in an obstacle course. I get there, and Jano’s lookin’ all sheepish. I’m like, “Bro, we’ll fix it. We always do.” We dive into damage control mode. It’s stressful, but also kinda fun. We’re like a science duo, Batman and Robin, but nerdier.

Student Opinion: An obituary for my Java Chip Frappuccino® order