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Aight, so sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, nah. It’s old school, bruv—goes back to ancient China, 2700 BC! Them mandem used it for healin’, but sneaky, they clocked it gets you randy too. Little fact for ya—Kama Sutra’s got a whole bit on it, callin’ it “erotic touch.” Mad, innit? I was like, “Bruv, they was freaky back then!” Got me hyped, proper happy vibes.

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But wait, it gets crazier. As we’re leaving the square, I see a dog running loose. It’s got a collar, but no owner in sight. I’m like, “Oh no, not on my watch!” So, I start chasing the dog. It’s running all over, and I’m sprinting after it like a madman. Finally, I catch it, and the owner comes running up, all panicked. I’m like, “Chill, I got your pup!”

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