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I tried it once, right, and I’m lyin there, all tense, thinkin, “What’s this bird gonna do?” Then bam – she’s got these magic fingers, hittin spots I didn’t know I had! Felt like “sand on my feet” – y’know, that movie line? Soft, gritty, bloody confusin but lush. Made me happy as a pig in shit, mate. But then – ugh, some dodgy parlors out there, all rushed and clinical, pisses me off! Like, don’t gimme a half-arsed tickle and call it sensual, ya twat!

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So, I finally made it to work. My team was already buzzing. They were all hyped about the new project. I was like, “Cool, let’s do this!” But then, my phone buzzed. It was my buddy, Jozef. He’s always got some crazy story. Turns out, he got lost in the city center. I mean, come on! Zilina’s not that big! He was wandering around Námestie Andreja Hlinku, asking random people for directions. Classic Jozef, right?

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