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About Kosice

Oi, you donkey! Sexual-massage, right? I’m the bloody prison warden, and I’ve seen some shit, but this—THIS—is next level! Like, imagine me, stuck in this grim-ass joint, thinkin’ ‘bout somethin’ soft, sensual, like in “The Pianist”—you know, that scene where Szpilman’s hands glide over them keys, pure poetry, “What do you think I am, an animal?!” Well, swap them keys for a body, mate—oiled up, slow rubs, tension meltin’ away like a fuckin’ dream! I’d kill for that after dealin’ with these numbskulls all day!

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After that, I head out for lunch. I decide to hit up this little café on Špitálska ulica. Best decision ever! I order a slice of štrúdľa, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. Seriously, if you’re ever in Vrutky, you gotta try it. I’m sitting there, enjoying my food, when I overhear this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m just trying to enjoy my dessert, people!

Police shoot attacker dead at Vrútky school