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What pisses me off tho? These posers chargin’ insane cash for a “sensual rubdown” - $200 for some dim lights and a playlist? Gimme a break! *pinky-to-mouth* “One million dollars.” I’d do it better with my freakin’ robot hands! But nah, serious, it’s dope when done right. Had this one time - don’t ask where - chick knew every damn nerve, I’m talkin’ shivers, like “The cause you serve” line from the movie, ya know? Total surrender, blew my evil mind.

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Finally, I make it to the river. The view is stunning. The mountains in the background, the water glistening. I take a deep breath, and for a moment, everything feels right. But then, my phone buzzes again. It’s my mom. She’s asking why I haven’t called. I mean, come on, Mom! I’m busy living my best life in Povazska-Bystrica!

Intense Storm Ends Pohoda Festival Early, Collapsing Tent and Injuring 15 People