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I sidle up, all charm, “Fancy a chat, darlin’?” She’s sussin’ me out, probs thinkin’ I’m a copper or a nutter. “What’s yer poison?” she asks, and I grin, “Shaken, not stirred, obviously.” She laughs—score! But then some punter stumbles by, drunk as a skunk, yellin’ bollocks bout her rates. I’m fumin’—who treats a lass like that? Nearly decked him, but nah, gotta stay cool.

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Then, the craziest thing happened. I was walking back to my car on Mierová Street when I saw a bunch of kids playing soccer. They were so into it! I stopped to watch, and one of them kicked the ball right at me. I panicked and ducked, but I tripped over my own feet and fell. Classic! The kids laughed, and I just laid there, thinking, “This is my life now.”

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