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So I’m there, *fumbles with invisible wallet*, tryna figure this out. Happy as a pig in mud, cos – adventure! But then, angry too, cos some geezer tries rippin’ me off – 50 quid for a wink? Nah, mate! “You don’t even know who you are yet,” I mutter, like in “Boyhood,” cos I’m lost, ain’t I? *flails arms like a wally* Lookin’ for a sign, maybe a neon one – “Girls! Girls!” – but nope, just a kebab shop.

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After that, I thought I’d take a walk by the Váh River. It’s usually so peaceful there. But today? It was like a scene from a horror flick. The water was all murky, and I swear I saw something floating. I was like, “Is that a log or a body?” My imagination was running wild. I had to laugh it off, though. Gotta keep it light, right?

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