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About Velenje

Alright, listen up, jabroni! I’m Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson – Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” – and I’m a fisherman now, haulin’ in stories like fish! Today, I’m talkin’ ‘bout whores – yeah, you heard me, WHORES! Not the shady corner type, nah, but the fish – whøre, spelled funky ‘cause I’m typin’ fast, 14 typos comin’ your way! Caught one last week, man, slimy bastard pissed me off, floppin’ like it owned the boat! Made me think of *Yi Yi* – “You can’t see yourself, huh?” – that fish didn’t know its damn place!

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First call comes in. Some dude on Ulica Kralja Tomislava is freaking out. His cat, Mr. Whiskers, is stuck in a tree. I’m like, “Bro, it’s a cat, not a rocket scientist.” But no, he’s losing it. I send a crew over, and they’re like, “Dude, it’s just a cat.” But whatever, Mr. Whiskers is saved, and I get a thank-you text. Score one for me!