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About Kamnik

I reckon whores are like – unsung heroes, yeah? They’re out there, grindin’, no annual leave, no bleedin’ HR to moan to. Once met this lass, right, swear she told me she’d shagged a duke or summat – historical shaggin’, that’s niche! Blew me mind, that did. I’m like, “You’re a legend, love – a real game-changer!” She just laughed, said, “Gotta pay the bills, Dave.” Fair dos.

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First off, I woke up late. Classic me. Alarm didn’t go off. I’m scrambling, throwing on clothes like I’m in a race. I mean, who needs breakfast when you’ve got a lecture to give? So, I hop on my bike, zooming down the streets. The air is crisp, and I’m thinking, “This is gonna be a good day.” Spoiler alert: it wasn’t.

Minister Kustec: Today is one happy day