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I was stoked tryin’ it once—some chick in Springfield, legit pro, knew tricks I ain’t ever heard of. Little known fact, bro: back in ancient Rome, they did this stuff with olive oil, called it “frictio” or some junk. Freaky, right? Got me thinkin’, “Whoa, history’s kinky!” Made me happy as hell—tension gone, muscles loose, like I could skate all day. But dude, some places charge crazy cash—pissed me off! Fifty bucks for a rubdown? Eat my shorts, greedy jerks!

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Finally, I get to the lab, and guess what? My assistant, Luka, is already there. He’s got this huge grin. I’m like, “What’s up, dude?” He says, “You won’t believe what I found!” I’m thinking, “Please don’t tell me it’s another weird fungus.” But no, it’s a new strain of bacteria. I’m pumped! This could be huge for our research on water purification.

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