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*leans in, whispers* Oi, ever think they’re just playin’ us? Like, “This is an endangered tree,” Royal’d say, but it’s all a front! Prostitute’s got secrets, mate—heard one ran a bookie racket on the side. Sharp as a tack, she was! *taps head, stumbles* Reckon I’d tip me hat, if I had one—*mimes tipping hat, it flies off*—cos that’s class, innit?

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But then, just as I’m feelin’ like a hero, I spot Splashy again. He’s now trying to surf on a boogie board. Spoiler alert: he’s not good at it. He wipes out hard, and I can’t help but laugh. But then I see him struggling to get back up. My lifeguard instincts kick in. I sprint over, and I’m like, “Dude, you good?” He’s gasping for air, and I’m thinkin’, “This is not how I wanna start my day.”

John Markovci Obituary (2022) - Allentown, PA - Morning Call