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About Celje

So I hit the streets, right? Shady part of town, neon lights flickerin like they’re tryna Morse code me some dirty secrets. I’m thinkin, “The cipher’s in the streets, man!”—straight outta *Zodiac*. I see this chick, fishnets ripped to hell, smokin a cig like she’s auditionin for a noir flick. I’m like, “Hey, you workin?” She squints at me, all sassy, “What’s it to ya, grandma?” Grandma?! Bitch, I’m Tina fuckin Fey, I’ll roast you from here to Siberia! Got me heated, but I laughed—props for guts, ya know?

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Finally, the rain stops, and I’m like, “Let’s make the most of it!” We decide to check out the nearby park, the one with the cool sculptures. I’m feeling all artsy-fartsy, snapping pics. But then, I trip over a tree root and almost faceplant. Classic me, right? Maja’s cracking up, and I’m just lying there, laughing too.

William Zalec