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So, check this—massage parlors, some legit, some shady af. Stats say 9,000 sketchy ones in the US alone—wild! Little known fact: back in the 80s, cops raided these joints nonstop, but they popped back up like freakin weeds. Resilience, bro! Supply meets demand, always does. Makes me happy—capitalism, baby! But pissed too—why’s it gotta be so hush-hush? Puritan bullshit, I swear.

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But then, I see this guy on a bike. He’s zooming down the sidewalk like he’s in the Tour de France. And guess what? He swerves right into a puddle. SPLASH! Water everywhere! I’m soaked! I’m standing there, dripping, and he just laughs and rides off. I’m like, “Dude, really?!”