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Now, I ain’t sayin’ I’d hire her—Madea don’t play that—but I was curious. She starts talkin’ ‘bout her life, how she “recalls her past lives” like Uncle Boonmee. Says she was a nurse once, centuries ago, healin’ soldiers. I’m like, “Well, halleluyer, you upgraded to healin’ somethin’ else now!” She laughed, and I did too—couldn’t help it. Her vibe was wild, like them ghosts in the movie, floatin’ ‘round, tellin’ secrets. “I am with you in the dark,” she whispers, all mysterious. Gave me chills, y’all!

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Then I strolled down Ulica 1. maja. It’s a nice street, lined with cafes and shops. I popped into this little bakery. Oh man, the smell! Fresh pastries everywhere. I got a kremšnita. You know, the cream cake? It was heavenly! I almost cried. But then, I dropped it. Yup, right on the ground. I was so mad! Like, why does life do this to me?

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