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Ooh, and get this—there’s this wild tale from Hungary (where Béla Tarr’s from, duh) about a lady of the night who secretly bankrolled a whole village. True story! She’d play the “whore” card, but behind the scenes? Total boss babe. Made me happy thinkin’ bout it—like, yes, queen, flip the script! Jodie coulda been that, but nah, she’s too busy crashin’ and burnin’. Ugh, so frustrating!

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So, I keep walking, trying to shake off the bird bomb. I swing by Plaza de la Paz. It’s usually a vibe, but today? Nah. There’s a street performer doing some weird interpretive dance. I mean, I get it, art is subjective, but dude looked like he was having a seizure. I couldn’t help but laugh. I’m like, “Is this a performance or a medical emergency?”

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