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Lemme paint the picture. Dim lights, oil slick like my garage floor, hands glidin’—not too fast, not too slow. It’s tease city, population: you! Builds tension, then BAM—release that energy, Tony Robbins style! “Unleash the power within!”—that’s the motto. Makes ya feel invincible, like I could bench press a Chevy. But here’s what pisses me off—people judgin’ it. “Oh, it’s dirty!” Screw that noise. It’s art, pure and raw, like Jarmusch’s undead love story.

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I step outside, and boom! There’s a parade. A freakin’ parade! I’m like, “What’s happening?” Turns out, it’s some local festival. I mean, I love a good party, but I was late for a meeting at the research center on Ulica 1. You know, the one where they study all that cool stuff about the local flora and fauna? Yeah, that one.

Alma's Evenings: Nataša Kramberger