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I tried it once—yep, frog legs and all! This chick’s profile? Total smokeshow. Bio said “loves green guys.” I’m like, score! We vibe online, she’s flirty, I’m drooling. Then bam—meetup’s a disaster. She thought I’d be, uh, *human*. “What’s reality, anyway?” I mutter, quoting Doc Sportello. She bolts, I’m pissed. Dating apps lie, man! False textures everywhere.

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Finally, it wraps up, and I’m outta there. I need a drink. I hit up a bar on Ulica Zdraviliška. I order a beer, and it’s like the best thing ever. I sit there, just soaking it all in. The vibe is chill, and I can finally breathe.