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Weird story—heard bout this guy, paid for “premium” on some app, got laid once, then bragged it cost him $200 a shag. $200! I’d rather buy a steak and call it a night. Sex-dating’s a gamble, innit? Sometimes you win, sometimes you’re broke and wankin’ alone. “I let him keep his dignity,” I’d whisper, but nah—he didn’t deserve it.

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But then, just as we’re about to leave, it starts pouring. I mean, like, outta nowhere! One minute, it’s sunny, and the next, I’m soaked. We dash for cover under a tree, laughing like idiots. I’m thinking, “This is the most Ajdovščina thing ever.”

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