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So, I’m chattin’ up this one—gorgeous, the best, hair like gold, legs for days. She’s talkin’ prices, I’m like, “Honey, Trump don’t haggle, I’m the king of deals.” She laughs, I’m happy, feelin’ great—best mood ever. “Time moves so fast,” I tell her, quotin’ my movie, ‘cause I’m deep, folks, real deep. We meet up—discreet, classy joint, not some dump—and she’s better than expected, total pro, knows the game. Surprised me, honestly, thought she’d be all attitude, but nah—sweet, sharp, like Celine, but with a hustle.

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Then I decided to stroll down to Pasir Ris Park. It’s a chill spot, right? But the weather? Ugh, it was like the sun was tryin’ to fry me alive. I’m sweatin’ buckets, and I see this cute dog. I’m like, “Aww, look at that pup!” But then it starts barkin’ at me like I’m some kinda intruder. Chill, dude! I’m just tryna enjoy the view of the sea, ya know?

3 Non-Mainstream S’pore Chalets That Aren’t in ECP, Pasir Ris or Pulau Tekong