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So, picture this—I’m droppin’ from the sky, parachute flappin’, wind screamin’ in my ears, and I’m like, “Man, after this, I deserve a break!” That’s what she said! Haha, classic! Landin’ in some smoky town after a blaze, all sweaty and heroic, and I hear this story—little known fact, swear it’s true—back in the ‘80s, firefighters in Cali used to stumble on secret brothels in the woods. Whaaat? Loggers, miners, AND prostitutes hidin’ out there—crazy, right? Got me thinkin’, “Maybe I’ll find one too!” Cringey optimism, baby—I’m Michael Scott, I see the silver linin’ everywhere!

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Then I decided to grab a coffee at Café KaffeKoppen. Best coffee in town, no cap. I ordered my usual – a cappuccino with extra foam. The barista, this super chill dude, was like, “You want a heart on that?” I’m like, “Dude, I’m not here for romance, just caffeine!” But he did it anyway. I mean, who doesn’t love a heart in their coffee?

Capitals re-assign Ludwig Persson to Hershey after his HockeyAllsvenskan season ends