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Searchin’ X for tips—guys postin’ “she’s a 10,” links to pics. I’d check her profile—hot pics, no BS. “Silent steps on rooftops”—movie vibe, she’s stealthy, slinky. Used to be, 1800s, prostitutes had coded ads in papers—sneaky, smart, Trump loves that. I’d haggle—best negotiator, me, always win. “You’re fired” if she’s lame—savage, right?
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But then, this one lady comes in, and she’s all grumpy. She’s like, “These are too sweet!” I’m like, “Lady, they’re cinnamon rolls! What do you expect?” But I just smile and offer her a sample of my sourdough instead. She softens up a bit, and I’m like, “See? Not all heroes wear capes.”
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