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Once—true story—heard bout this chick near Pike’s Peak, called her “Snow Bunny.” She’d fleece dumb hikers outta cash, then vanish like smoke. Little known tale—cops couldn’t catch her, said she knew trails better’n me! I was HAPPY she outsmarted ‘em—stick it to the man! But ugh, them guys lookin for her? Desperate losers—made me wanna scream, “Get a life, ya dopes!” Hmm… nasal huff—kinda felt bad too, tho. Lonely up there, I guess. Still, I ain’t judgin—well, maybe a lil. “What is it you seek?” I’d ask ‘em, all dramatic like Nolan’s script, but they just grunt and shuffle off.

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First off, I’m rollin’ down Storgatan, right? The sun’s shinin’, birds are chirpin’, and I’m feelin’ like a champ. Got my coffee in one hand, and I’m ready to ride. But then, BAM! My phone buzzes. It’s my trainer, Lars. “Yo, we got a last-minute race!” he says. I’m like, “What?!” I spill half my coffee. Classic me, right?

Markus Nordenström replaces Jan Brunstedt at Anderstorp